← Back to all scams

Romance scams: the person who always needs money

Someone you met online builds a relationship over weeks or months, then starts asking for money.

How this scam works

It usually starts somewhere ordinary: a dating site, a Facebook group, a game, or a message that arrives "by mistake". The person is warm, attentive and interested in your day. They message every morning. For weeks or months they ask for nothing at all. That patience is the whole method.

Then a problem appears. A medical bill. Customs holding a package. A frozen bank account. A plane ticket to finally come and visit you. The amounts start small and grow.

They always have a reason they cannot video call, or the call is very short and blurry. They often say they work abroad: oil rigs, the military, international engineering.

This scam causes more distress than almost any other, because the loss is not only financial. If you are reading this about someone you love, please know that being taken in says nothing about your intelligence. These are organised teams following a script.

Warning signs

• They avoid video calls, or the camera "never works"
• They declare strong feelings unusually quickly
• They work abroad and cannot meet in person
• The first request for money is small and comes with an emergency
• They ask you to keep the relationship private from your family

What to do

1. Never send money to someone you have not met in person.
2. Do a reverse image search on their photos. Right-click the photo, copy the image, and search it on images.google.com.
3. Tell one person you trust. Scammers rely on you keeping it secret.
4. Slow down. A genuine partner will wait.

Last updated 29 September 2026. Source: Action Fraud.